Gearing up for war, but the battle never began?

“Good is good all the time……”

Hello everyone! Sorry that I haven’t been on here too much. I’m not sure how many people actually read my post. But I know someone has to be, and I haven’t done an update in a long time. I have been extremely busy. So let me catch you up!

Week 4, which was my “off my meds week” was awesome! No full feeling in the stomach, no fear of side effects, no needing to remember meds, no nothing. I’d be lying if I said I stuck 100% to my diet, I didn’t. I did, however, stay away from the really big allergens. That week flew buy and here we are now, end of week 1 on month 2 of Lyme treatment.

“……it’s going fantastic!”

How is week 1 of month 1 going? Well, compared to how it’s suppose to be going according to doctors, articles and other Lyme patients, it’s going fantastic. I’m tired, but I’m also under a lot of stress. Currently, I have a bit of a headache, but nothing I can’t handle. I didn’t think that I was going to be able to carry my nieces by the way everyone was describing HERX, but as the picture below shows, that’s not the case at all! No dizziness, no pain, no nausea, no nothing out of the ordinary. I just feel FULL! But that’s to be expected when you have 3-4 different prescription drugs in your body on top of 8-9 different supplements adding up to a whopping 28-30 pills a day! I feel like I have to force myself to eat. If I don’t eat, the pills will mess up my stomach. But I’m a huge believer in intermittent fasting, so it’s super hard to wake up and eat, but I have no choice.

Being gluten free isn’t that hard now with all the options there are no a days. I found the best chicken ever at the Earth Fare that just opened up my my house. The chicken is the best and it’s breaded but gluten free! Throw it in the convention oven and it’s meal time for me! I also found that the Amy’s products are pretty good too. Everything is just SUPER EXPENSIVE! But I’m sure y’all knew that.

I’m sitting here laying in my bed, listening to my family sleep and I’m thinking a lot. That’s one thing, the Lyme and the treatment have my anxiety levels on high! My mind doesn’t turn off. I know I’m not crazy, but sometimes it feels like I’m having a bunch of conversations at once. Like right now I’m writing this, but thinking about what I have to do, what we’re some of the conversations I had today, the stresses I have and much much more. The doctor said this is normal for Lyme and once I have the money, I’ll be buying, yep you guessed it, more supplements to help with this. My sleep cycle is all messed up too. I work 4-10 pm most days not getting home till after midnight and then I sleep in all day. So I’m sure that doesn’t help.

“Yes, a medication that causes nightmares.”

I started the low LDN this week too. I was scared to take it because it’s main side effect, NIGHTMARES! Yes, a medication that causes nightmares. I’m already have some pretty crazy dreams. Not that they are scary, but they feel real. So real that when I wake up, it takes me a while to realize that it was a dream. So I’ll lay there thinking that all really happened. I had stopped having dreams for a while, stared the medication and the dreams started again, and they feel SUPER REAL!

I’m saying all of this to make a point. Yes I’m tired, my belly feels full all the time and I’m dreaming a lot more than normal. But tonight as I was laying in my bed, I remembered how I bought certain meds and put so many safe guards in place gearing up for war that is HERX, but the battle never came.

I saw my parents today, I don’t see them often and it sucks! But I saw them today. I have two moms, and my moms wife, who I call Titi, hugged me really tight today and said “how are you feeling baby” and I told her “honestly, I feel great, better then I expected.” I’m not complaining, I’m happy I feel so good. But I feel guilty. Guilty that others have to suffer and struggle a lot more than me. Who am I that I am having HERX easier than others? The only thing I know that is keeping me feeling good is God. I asked Him to heal me and I know that He is. They say mind over matter right. Well I have God over Lyme and He’s defeating the battle for me. And even if everything goes down hill, the battle begins and the war of HERX is on, my God is bigger, greater and stronger and He will still be, has always been and will continue to be GOOD.

This is Week 1 of Month 2

God bless you all.

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